Wednesday, November 25, 2015

Orange The World (Not Only) Within 16 Days Activism

May some of you found the hashtag #OrangeTheWorld or #ViolenceAgainstWomen or #16Days in many media or social media within these days. Maybe you asked, what was that mean? Now, read my writing to find the answer. You can also read my writing before, due to this issue here or this post.

Maybe one of them is someone you MEET, maybe one of them is someone you KNOW, maybe one of them is someone CLOSE to you, maybe one of them is YOU.

What is Orange The World Means?

Orange The World is a campaign to the world to have encourage and take part in action to stop violence against women. Every 25th November we commemorate the day anti-violence against women. Why orange? Yep, orange is a power color. It's one of healing color. It also give an encourage about enthusiasm, relieving repressions and creativity. Orange represents enthusiasm, fascination, happiness, creativity, determination, attraction, success, encouragement, and stimulation.

To The Society

You might think, this is waste my time, or what I should care about, after all said, this is just a theoretical discourse and a mere of rhetoric. Just please. But, what I'm trying to say here is an advocate for you to openly think and together to fix what's wrong with us, our system, our thinking, our culture and perhaps even our ideology during this time. I am not an extreme feminist activist, but yes, I do put a big respect to gender issues. I mean, I don't refuse to give birth, take care of husband and children, cooking, clean up the house and so on, and so on...because, THE FACT is we are born from the womb of a woman. The fact is women can do the birth and men don't. I want to see my children well maintained with all good nutrition, I want my family stay in a clean and comfortable environment, and I will do all those things with pleasure. Fact. However, it doesn't mean the pleasure thing we're doing it, then you deserve to label it with the word 'SHOULD' and 'ONLY'. This should be done by a woman, this isn't man's job. Only woman should do this, this not man's business. Only women who should work on this, for man this is embarrassing. Oh peanuts, thanks. We, the women, had enough these wonderful words of yours, now get up! Wake up! If we were allowed by our grandma to shout out, then we would harshly say, "I hope one day you choke on the shit you talk". Ups, sorry, grandma says we should not say the rude thing, isn't it?

Listen, I say to the world, at least please...please look at us, put your respect to us. Highlighting dowry deaths, genital mutilation, rape, domestic violence, female foeticide, malnutrition, and all barbaric behavior and culture. Even, don't we always make women's body as a commodity comedy at any media? THIS IS A GLOBAL PANDEMIC. True. So....what we can do? You may say, "We can't help anyone. We can't help anything". I say, "Hey, smart! Absolutely, you CAN, I CAN, all of us CAN help to this issue! We can help MANY!" Maybe partly sarcastic saying, "Are you dreaming to change the world?". NO. I AM NOT. I may not dreaming if I could write to you here, to share and to give an understanding to you here. Further, to enlighten you. 

Most reason like--our government doesn't have any policy to reduce the amount of violence against women. But you can spread your words, no? At least you still have brains to think healthy. Respect is not taken for granted. If we want the world's respect, we should lead the way and show them in practices. Each of us has a duty to be advocacy worker for large changes in the long term, for the enforcement of women's rights. Be part of the change in the community to support our advocacy. Raise awareness about violence that women faced, everyday, everywhere. Why do we become  a pathetic human when we choose to silent while we hear, we see, and maybe even we be able to prevent the violence? Why? Whether we have deaf ears? Whether our eyes are blind? Whether the value of our humanity has been away from the word 'civilized'. Yes, we are not civilized humans. We being fought each other, we are pleased to degrading women, we are happy if we feel more intelligent than others. We feel satisfied by making women and girls as a weapon gratification. Don't we?

To The Survivors
Me, hardly condemned all of women who demeaning themselves to the world. To you, all the survivors, just go educate and empower ourselves to be part of the solution to the conflict. Don't perform action that approve of violence you experienced. NEVER. Here, Eleanor Roosevelt said: "No one can make you feel inferior, without your consent"

If you still have the patience and confidence to change things you meet, please survive and prove that you are worthy. You deserve to be loved. However, if you can not change them, the only way is to get away from it. Leave all the negative things that hurt you, leave all the negative things that humiliate your dignity, leave all the things that don't uphold human morality. We are entitled to all the better. We deserve better. Then, you may ask what should I do? Meet people who can help you and you trust. But keep remember, don't trust anyone exceed you trust yourself. Open your hearts and minds to people with positive energy around you, start from you, of course

I know, and I do really understand how it's not easy become a survivor with all the bad paradigms and bad stigma that still pick on survivors, but all will still end badly if you give up to inhumanity. You don't help yourself, you even don't help people out there who are facing similar cases like you. You are not alone. Never. If there is among you who read this, and become a survivor, you can exchange thoughts to me and told me, I give you a free warranty, until you don't up to talk again. You can email me up there--how to contact me. We all heal differently and within specific time frames and following our own distinctive patterns. No matter how quickly or slowly you move through the healing process, it only matters that you are moving through it at all. It's something you must learn and understand for yourself. You have no reason to feel guilty for your abuser's/attacker's actions because it was their choice to inflict violence on you. 

What We Can Do?

There are so many ways we can do to help, to protect and even to prevent all actions of violence against women. The simplest thing, if you meet or see the victim, you can help with listen and believe, instead of you give them order to explain their trauma; blamed for what happened to them; or judge about their future. You can make the survivors feel safer with having trustworthy, stable, and accepting community to support them. Give the survivors our support in appropriate ways. Like what? If you have excess money and you feel like a philanthropic, you can donate some for institutions that care for the survivor's health or whatever support programs that work to help victims and prevent family violence. What if you don't have excess money to donate to? You still CAN help of course! You can write, you can be conscious of the heinous crimes in different countries and highlight them, you can spread the words to your community. You can enlighten society culture to not embarrass or mock the survivors. They've experienced something tough, if it should be added with gossip or inhumane mocking. Go educate ourselves about violence against women: what we can help to the survivors; about state law to protect women's right; about the victim's health; about the symptoms and signs of post-trauma recovery; and so on. Together, we can UNITE to actively ensure that women the world over are safe from violence and can live with basic human dignity. Because, violence is always violence, whatever its form, whatever its excuse. There's just NO. Unacceptable. Speak up! Give our support to stand up, to speak out, and to STOP violence against women.


Bening Rahardjo